I love writing, and I actually love the process of bringing a book together. There are the very hard days of wondering why I decided to do this, the fearful days of doubting I can get to the end, then more doubt about whether I should actually out it into the world, the editing and editing and editing, but then it is done and it shows up at the house as an actual book and I think, ‘wow, that’s pretty cool.’ But that is when the worst part of writing starts: the promotion. Being an artist and being a marketer are not the same thing, you can be both of course, but the energy of one is not the energy of the other and it is especially hard to promote your own work, at least it is for me. I suppose in this world of social-media and influencers it is not hard for everyone.

My very supportive husband kindly but firmly said, as I plunked the large box of books on the entry bench, “you do know that now you have to promote your work?” And then he said, “right?” in order to get more than that guttural response I initially offered. “Yes,” I said, “I know, I will.” And so here I am – doing that work.

Maybe you feel like you are generous enough in the world, or maybe you feel like generosity is not something that we have to do, or maybe you feel like everyone just wants something and you are tired of giving alone. I wrote The Giving Bitch because giving, sharing, receiving all feel a little fraught to me. How much is enough? How much is too much? How can I do this in a kind, healthy way? And what if what I really need right now is to be the recipient, to be taken care of? I think about these things a lot and so I enjoyed writing and exploring the theme. But, I think even if you don’t think about this a lot some of the exercises in the book can help you be a little more intentional in all of your relationships and all of your interactions.

Knowing your values and acting on them affirmatively can be a great way of making hard decisions about jobs, and friends, and activities. Learning how to build greater awareness of the reality and circumstances of your life allows you to move proactively in the direction you need and want. Gratitude changes your relationship to the people, places, and things in your life in a way that opens so much more space for personal, spiritual, and emotional growth. The Giving Bitch has a little of all of this, helping us to think about who we are and how we want to be in the world so I really hope you’ll check it out.

You can grab it on kindle or in paper, but the exercises are better in paper and because some of the work requires patience I think having a physical book to work in is helpful. That’s my recommendation, obviously not a requirement. I am donating all of the profit from the book to First Presbyterian Church in Oakland so it will support the work of feeding people, welcoming refugees, caring for our literal neighbors, providing space for music, and concerts, and art, and a whole lot more. Give it a chance – maybe just so you can say the name!

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